May 2013
344 posts
Status: Rain! :)
Older person on Facebook: Us too, so badly needed as well. Tell your mom I said hi. How is the family? Tell everyone hi from us. We miss you all so much. Wish we could be there. You're a beautiful young woman.
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As I'm eating some ice cream...
Clif: Is that your dinner? Did you eat any real food?
Javi: ...
Javi: It's not like I'm imagining this ice cream.
Clif: -_-
when i’m married my partner and i will have:
morning sex
afternoon sex
dinner sex
after meal sex
i made pancakes sex
good morning sex
they kids are at school sex
shower sex
bored sex
make up sex
break up sex
obama won sex
romney lost sex
monday sex
tuesday sex
wednesday sex
thursday sex
friday sex
saturday sex
monday sex
there is nothing on tv sex
i love you sex
“As an introvert, you can be your own best friend or your own worst enemy. The...”
– Laurie Helgoe (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
parkersparkour:
I crashed my car into a bridge
I don’t care
I love it
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Just found out that my shoulder is doing great 7...
No more follow ups with the orthopedist! Onto physical therapy and should be back just in time for the start of fall rugby practices!
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Well what a great start to the day.
Had a very pleasant lunch date with a friend and look forward to a dinner double date next week. :) he’s cute and has substance, excited to see where it goes.
superwholockian-writer:
misha-let-me-touch-your-assbutt:
Walking into school:
Logging into tumblr:
#this is too accurate
(A gay couple has just met up in the restaurant and kissed each other upon arrival. Another customer has seen this and is obviously angry.)
Angry Customer: “Damn f**s.”
Gay Man: “Excuse me?”
Angry Customer: “You heard me, you little s***. Let’s not make this into some little pride protest, okay? I have to accept that you’re going to live your lifestyle, and you have to accept that I’ve got freedom of speech.”
Gay Man: *quietly* “Is it too much to ask for a little human decency?”
Angry Customer: “Human? Listen up, what you’re doing is not human. I think I have the right to determine what I think is human.”
(The manager shows up. He’s a quiet Italian man who I assume is conservative due to the Christian imagery and portrait of Reagan he keeps around the restaurant.)
Angry Customer: *to the owner* “Hey, can you move either them or us to another table?”
(Instead of responding to the angry customer, the owner instead speaks to his wife.)
Owner: “I’m sorry ma’am, but we have a strict ‘no pets’ policy in my restaurant.”
Wife: “Uh, I, uh, what? I don’t have a—”
Owner: “Well, according to your talking monkey over here, I can determine who’s a human and who’s not. You bring an animal into my restaurant; I gotta assume it’s your pet.”
(The angry customer storms out. When I left, the owner was giving his description, and copies of security camera footage, to the biggest crowd of police I’ve seen. Apparently it’s a bad idea to not pay your bill at a restaurant that gives free coffee to cops.)
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“The most painful thing is losing yourself in the process of loving someone too...”
– Ernest Hemingway (via onlinecounsellingcollege)
“If they don’t need you, it’s okay. You do not live for other people.”
– Kyo (via petarted)
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tmi
kansascitybiggin:
keep the questions coming. ill answer any questions, take a peak into my mind
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Play with my dick instead of my feelings thank u
Or just leave me alone, please. Thanks.
“I am a hard person to love but when I love, I love really hard.”
– Tupac Shakur (via ruthless-villain)
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x-statix asked: 11, 15, 45
frankinblah asked: Thanks, I look rough cause I'm still in bed being lazy buuut ya thank you! Your handsome yourself.
frankinblah asked: 81,69,31
In honor of masturbation month....
1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer?
2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why:
3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed:
4: Something that never fails to make you horny:
5: Where is one place you would never have sex:
6: The most awkward moment during a sexual experience was when ______________
7: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny:
8: What is the best way to sexually bind someone:
9: Handcuffs, Rope, or Other [if other please explain]:
10: What is the fastest way to make you horny:
11: Top or bottom?
12: We were about to ____________ but then ______________
13: Would you ever take a sexual enhancement drug?
14: Is one orgasm enough? Are multiple orgasms necessary?
15: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:
16: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you:
17: Two things you like [or dislike] about oral sex:
18: Weirdest sexual act some has performed [or tried to perform] on/with you:
19: Have you ever tasted yourself? [If no, would you?] [If yes, what did you think?]
20: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:
21: Who was the sexiest teacher you ever had?
22: A food that you would like to use during a sexual experience:
23: How big is too big (peniswise):
24: One sexual thing you would never do:
25: Biggest turn on:
26: Three spots that drive you insane:
27: Worst possible time to get horny:
28: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans:
29: Worst sexual idea you ever had:
30: How much fapping is too much fapping:
31: Best sexual complement you ever got:
32: Bald, landing strip, Jumanji:
33: Is it good sex if you don’t nut:
34: Fill in the blanks: "If they ____________, we are fuckin"
35: What your favorite part of your body:
36: Favorite foreplay activities:
37: Love (>,
38: What do you wear to bed?
39: When was the first time you masturbated:
40: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?
41: Have you ever/when was the last time you had sex outside?
42: Have/would you ever have sex outside?
43: Have/would you ever had a threesome?
44: What is one random object you’ve used to masturbate?
45: Have/would you ever masturbate at work?
46: Have/would you ever have sex on a plane?
47: What is one song you’d like to have sex to?
48: What is something nonsexual that makes you horny?
49: Most attractive celebrity?
50: Do you watch gay/lesbian porn? why/why not?
51: If a child was born on the occasion of the last time you had sex, how old would that child be right now
52: Has anyone ever posted nude pictures of you online?
53: What is one thing that NEVER makes you horny?
54: Do you have stretch marks?
55: How do you feel about your stretch marks?
56: Has anyone ever had a problem with your stretch marks?
57: Do you like giving head? (why/why not)
58: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?
59: How would you feel about taking someones virginity?
60: Is there any food you would NOT recommend using during a sexual encounter?
61: Is there anything you do on tumblr that you would not like your significant other to see?
62: Do you own any sex toys? (what is it? (how long have you had it?)
63: Would you give your significant other unrestricted access to your Tumblr for a day?
64: Would you be offended if your significant other suggested you get plastic surgery?
65: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?
66: Do you watch porn?
67: How small is too small?
68: Have you ever been called a freak? Why?
69: Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything?
70: Would you switch phones with your significant other for a day?
71: Do you feel comfortable going "commando"?
72: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn't shaved their pubic hair?
73: If you could give yourself head, would you?
74: Booty or Boobs?
75: If you had a penis, what would you name it?
76: Have you ever been on an official date?
77: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)
78: If you were a stripper, what would your name be?
79: Have you ever had sex in your parents bed? (Would you?)
80: How would you react if you found out your parents had sex in your bed?
81: What was your reaction the first time you saw a penis/vagina
this seems fun